ANTM Cycle 14: More Jumpsuit, Less Cheese Fest, More Molesting Nigel Barker

Well its in full force people: America’s Next Top Model.  Its on!!  It really is my guilty pleasure.  I look forward to it and watch faithfully.  I have to admit that up until this season (though it has just started so I am hoping to Christ that I am not speaking to soon!), the cheese fest that has been ANTM drove me crazy.  Really, I’m in it for the fashion, photo shoots and photography.  I know it sounds like reading playboy for the articles, but its true.  I hate the cheesy challenges they force down the throats of those poor girls.  Particularly when it is Tyra leading the challenge.  She has to be one of the most annoying beautiful people on tv.  When she came out a couple seasons ago in a cape and was some kind of “smize” (smile with your eyes) superhero I think I threw up a little in my mouth.

Cheese Fest! Captain Smize!

There has been less about the whole “Smize” thing this season.  With the addition of new judge Andre Leon Talley it is all about the “dreckitude”.  Does anyone know what the hell he is talking  about?  What the hell is that?  I don’t think that it has been defined.  I am not sure what Tyra is attempting to do this season and while I am thankful that we have less of her annoying role play events, she is all about the jumpsuits.  Yes Jumpsuits.  She isn’t jumping out of a plane nor is it 1972.  But no one has informed Tyra of this and she is wearing a new one each week.  I guess it a game of give and take: Tyra Cheese or Tyra Jumpsuits.  I’ll take jumpsuits.

So far it is the usual ANTM – people get eliminated, who cares?  Its not like any of these poor tortured girls get any work after they bust their humps for Tyra.  And thankfully we haven’t had to endure a video Cover Girl Commercial.  Those things are just gut wrenching.  But I am sure it is coming!

The highlight of the season came this week when the girls got to grope Nigel Barker.  He played the role of shy male model that the girls had to charm.  They left the girls more or less trapped and alone with Nigel in a gondola and then expressed surprise when they flirted with and molested him shamelessly!

Frankly,  if left alone anywhere with Nigel, he wouldn’t have escaped with even one garment of clothing.  The man is HOT and another reason to indulge in ANTM!  And since he is so damn hot I am going to shamelessly include another picture of him cause its my blog!

And Cycle 14 continues….

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